Astral Stagnation

This year closes on a soft note.

No tragedies to great to handle in my own life.

No falling too far from the sun.

Its been a year of transition for myself.

In past years it has been one of wandering, seeking, and never finding who I was looking for.

I've surrendered that past because I did find something, myself and this is not just in an artist's context either.

The answer always lay within of course but when you do not know, you know, you will try to find it esoterically. 

I can only wonder how much faster next year will go. 

I hope for my own sake not too fast. 

There is plenty of work to be done and I am hoping to have what needs to be done by July.

Leaving me six months of time to figure out what the next phase is.

While my writing took a back step for other ambitions and concerns I did not stop.

I divided my time between two prospective novels in their early stages.

I cannot say too much about it, learning that people steal intellectual property regardless of the costs to the person they are victimizing woke me up from that.

A writer's best story is always the one he has yet to tell. 

I am hoping to have one of them drafted by April and will have my pen looking for a suitable editor.

It may not be the big one I'm expecting it to be but I want to make a greater effort to see it in the hands of people walking by. 

I know something is coming for me next year but hopefully all good things. 

In my explorations inward and in the deepest of consciousness there have been only a few trickles.

Since I cannot be certain anymore about the validity of my dreams, both positive and negative.

I may have stopped or halted my exploration there.

While reality does seem more enjoyable for the time being. 

I can sense that there is much more to know but the fear is do I want to know?

While the title may suggest my life is going nowhere in reality a lot has changed.

A lot has happened and it was a productive year.

I set as an intention for next year to accept next year in what ever form it may take.
To see joy in even the most tragic situation.
To not be too hard on myself as I have in most years past.
And too not try to anticipate too much without it actually occurring.

So as opposed to a new years resolution to stop something or reach some personal milestone.
I am simply accepting next year as another year I am able to breathe freely.
I'll say with a quiet voice, to my grandmother Happy New Year.

This night will end like any other and tomorrow I might find something from the Astral Plain waiting for me when I wake.

One can only dream.

-Astral Samurai