Where Do We Go Now?

After going back and forth over the argument with my wife I decided on dealing with my boss first. I wrote back honestly but not to the point of sharp razor edge cut your ears off type honesty. I put pretty much everything I had on the table and before I let my temper get too far stepped away from the keyboard, got out of the car and lit a cigarette.
Its not really a big deal anyway. I thought.
And it wasn't.

My boss replied very simply,
okay stay safe. 
We can talk about a raise when you get back. Maybe.
Tempted to write back in a fitful temper I shook my head and just wrote, thanks for understanding.
I turned the car on looking for things to distract me while I tried to figure out what my response to my wife would be. I wished I kept the beer and I figured might as well check on the dude under the bridge anyway.
Turning the car off and almost but not really slipping on the same spot I slipped on before under the bridge. But to my amazement the guy already left with the beer.
"Smooth Junky" I said aloud hoping he might be around to hear it.
It got a little colder out & I considered calling it a night in this small Pennsylvania forest town. I knew this was the type of town that would swallow me up &; like some horror story I'd never be able to leave.
I made it back onto the main street and the same sounds reverberated the town. Clanking glasses, laughter and a few ohhhhs from rowdy men commenting on a hockey game. There was a strange sense of relief when I made it back onto the highway.

There seemed like there were more cars on the road, but at night I almost always got that impression.
I put all the negative things my wife said far away from the surface of my mind.
For now it was just me and the road.
I still have no idea where I am going...
Then it really dawned on me that I should set a concrete destination like a rally point or something.
I knew I had one or two friends out west that I had not spoken with in years.
Not that anything went wrong or there were bad words between us our lives just drifted us away.
I don't even know if thats his number anymore?
I did some more brain footwork and remembered that there were one or two family members that lived out there but I hadn't spoken with them in an even longer time.
It wouldn't make sense to just go and keep going til I ran out of gas...would it?

I drove for another two hours passing time by messing around with the mirrors, and windows.
I don't know exactly why I was doing it but I'm pretty sure it was just me distracting myself from the questions I was asking myself.
I got a text from Jake around then saying to, call before mom flips again.
I pulled over to the shoulder to text back, nervous that some car might ram into me or a cop might toss me a ticket. I texted back without worrying about spelling, On road, can it w8?
Not even a few seconds between sending I received, DAD.
I felt like I was going to throw up, repressed guilt, furious anger, and mindful paranoia, "SHIT!"
I called Jake back without thinking about what I was going to say I inhaled deeply as the dial tone sounded off.
"I...Dad! Shes..." I heard feminine screeching in the background and I could sense the violence from her on the other side.
Jack yelled back at her, "Shut up! I'm trying to talk to Dad!"
I could barely make out the rest of it but I tried to calm Jake down, "Jake buddy I want you to go up to your room and lock the door okay? Just chill and talk to me for a while..."
I could hear the yelling get more distant and finally my wife came through clearly, "Jake where the hell are you going?!"
Jake's reply was only sensible, "My room DUHHHH!"
With that he shut the door behind him and things quieted down though I'm sure my wife was listening from outside the door.

"Dad shes going crazy...Like she told me to pack my bags and get ready to go to grandmas and I said F that."

My reply was, "I know shes just angry right now and there is nothing you or I can really do about it...I can't just turn back now its kinda on the wheels know what I mean?"

"Yeah." he replied.

"How are you dealing with it? Did they pick on ya?" I asked

Jake went into a whole slew of name calling and I had to tell him to stop right there.
"Ya gotta be tough, as long you can handle it and I know you can it will seem like nothing. Don't try to win an argument with your mother, I've tried a couple of times. Just yes her and do what you think is right. Can't always convince someone else your way is the right way even if its damned sure the right way."

Jake went on fighting the idea of giving in to his mom's demands. A couple of, "but dads" later something must have clicked. Might have been that old saying about understanding being a three edged sword. Either way Jake sounded better and a little more confident.

"I think I know what to do." he said.

"Alright I'm leaving it you to figure that part out."

"I got it." he said.

"Gotta go okay...Call me if she tries anything too crazy."

"Yeah I will. Bye dad."

"Bye, love you son."

The call ended and I shuttered, Did my son just grow up?
I took back to the road and asked myself again, where the hell am I going?
It was getting colder so the AC had to be turned on.
I started feeling a little happier and I decided that maybe staying in a hotel would make it easier on myself for the night.
That part of me saying, what a cop out!
Eventually died out when I saw a state trooper fly by and then the accident a few miles later.
"Uhh no that is a cop out."
I looked at the dashboard clock realizing it wasn't even 8 o'clock but I felt exhausted.
A half our later I found a Holiday Inn and bought the cheapest room they had.
Felt pretty good to take a shower and just be able to sleep in a full bed.

I checked over the mental checklist in my head, shut off the lights in the room and passed out with ease.